The Avengers as a Western
Steve is the Sheriff. Clint is his deputy. Tony is the Blacksmith. Natasha runs the Saloon. Bruce is the physician with a split personality and Thor gets into a hell of a lot of tavern brawls.
Together, however, they manage to bring order to the once corrupt town of Triskelion.
Old Hollywood Avengers
(because Tony throwing Gatsby-like parties is perfect)
That random quotes from the Avengers thing messed me up because.
Generally Nick Fury’s most quoted lines from the Avengers is from his scene telling off the WSC.
When it should be his “I still believe in heroes" line.
Because Nick Fury.
Nick Fury who “trusts no one”
Master manipulator and leader Nick Fury.
STILL. BELIEVES. IN. HEROES.
NICK FURY HAS THE HEART OF AN IDEALISTIC CHILD WRAPPED UNDER YEARS AND LAYERS OF CYNICISM, AND FUCK YOU I WILL FIGHT YOU ON THIS.
I may always reblog every gifset/imageset I see of this scene, if only to point out (over and over and over again) that Black Widow’s “very specific skillset” is not, actually, ass-kicking (as amazing as she is at that), because all the Avengers can kick ass to a pretty high degree. The Black Widow’s superpower (as it were) is emotional manipulation.
She is not interrogating this man not while tied to a chair. She is tied to a chair because that is exactly where she wants to be, because apparent vulnerability on her part is part of her interrogation. She uses the exact same trick on Loki later, when she leads him into gloating over having successfully pushed her buttons (and I have a theory that he did actually push her buttons, that she was genuinely distressed by the things he said to her because Loki is old enough and smart enough to know when someone is lying to him) and turns his gloating around on him, uses it to dig into the cracks of him, because that is what she does, and she can do it even when her target is expecting it. (Really, Loki knows that’s why she’s there. He was expecting to be physically tortured first, and for her to come be sympathetic later, if you recall, but Loki and Widow both know that wouldn’t work.)
And this is why she’s so unsettled by the Hulk. The Black Widow relies on emotional manipulation — and the Hulk, to the best of her knowledge, only has varying shades of a single emotion: anger. She doesn’t know how to manipulate a creature if it doesn’t have all the hooks to emotions like pride and lust and guilt and greed that she’s used to using.
This is a REALLY good character analysis of Natasha.
This just in: copperbadge is actually Clint Barton in an AU. The question is… what kind of AU?
The Chicago AU!
Steve Rogers grew up in Wrigleyville. The Serum was administered in a secret military base under Wrigley Field; the real reason we didn’t get night games until…
CHICAGO AU OH MY GOD
Steve as a Cubs fan is the funniest thing to me. Because he would actually enjoy Wrigleyville.
I love the idea of dorky loser Cubs fan Steve Rogers. Like, he’s one of those fans who earnestly believes this year is their year. Every year.
I also love the idea of Natasha pretending to be a giant White Sox fan just to fuck with him.
Wow, I REALLY love the coyotes.
Anonymous said:please please please tell us about your avengers recast
Omg I am so glad you asked
Tony Stark-Aldis Hodge
Please look me in the eye and tell me this man wasn’t born to play a Genius Billionaire Playboy Philanthropist. Tony Stark…
Paula Patton as Janet Van Dyne.
Guys, hey, guys. Do you remember that time that Coulson called Natasha and she ended up forming the Avengers? Remember how she did that by digging up Bruce Banner and introducing Steve to him then was the voice of reason when Tony and Steve were bickering and then how she brought Clint back from being mind controlled so that they can be a team? Remember that? Remember how the Black Widow out smarted a god? Remember that time she kept her shit together when the Hulk attacked her, even though she was really scared? Remember when she knocked an alien off his flying scooter and figured out how to drive it despite it being extrateresstrial tech, then got her ass up to the top of Stark Tower, found Loki’s staff and saved the world from being invaded by turning off the machine?
Remember how she was the central character of the whole freaking movie?
Anyone else remember that? I sure do.
#and remember how they didn’t sexualize her #remember how she was independent and didn’t need a male crutch #remember how when loki implied that she needed a man she completely tore him down #remember how natasha romanov doesn’t take shit from nobody #especially not a man
and yet all they asked scarlet was how difficult was it to get in her suit